Irene I heard from Dave this morning and was touched by his words and your website.

You may not recall but I was with the insurance compnay that started Dave off on his long and successfull career in Insuarnce.
I recall the many meetings during his precontract period and while he was still in law enforcement - recall visiting at the home and meeting you and thought was a beautiful smile you had and lovely family.  Without your support early on Dave would not be the success that he is today without you.

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

God Bless You

Jeff

8 p.m…

El-Roi (EL ROY) (The God Who Sees)

“Hagar referred to the Lord, who had spoken to her as ‘the God who sees me,’ for she said, ‘I have seen the One who sees me!’” 
Genesis 16:13

We’re so grateful that El Roi sees and knows everything.  The all seeing God knows and understands all that is happening surrounding Irene’s circumstances and we’re confident that he is pleased with her response as she walks through this ordeal.

Irene was challenged by nagging nausea and lethargy most of the day.  Marilyn Miller graciously spent some time with her this morning. 

El Roi is never surprised by anything. 

“From His throne He observes all who live on the earth.”
Psalm 33:14

“Nothing in all creation can hide from Him.  Everything is naked and exposed before His eyes.
Hebrews 4:13

We exalt the all seeing God who can sympathize with us and manifests His presence in our midst every day.  We trust in Him.

Thanks for caring.

Caminando con Fé
Dave

8 p.m. ....

A brief but strong impression hit me yesterday as I set the house alarm and left Irene at 4.30 a.m.  I was preparing to drive to Sacramento for a series of business meetings that obviously began very early in the morning!  To frame the intense feeling, here is some background and please forgive the personal reference ....

I’ve always been athletic, extremely competitive, was a cop (SWAT Team, undercover narcotics and major crimes task force) for 10 years, an elected politician and the breadwinner of our home.  I’m in the “risk transfer” business.  I have always perceived myself to be the spiritual leader (actually, the family priest) and consummate “protector” of Irene and our family.  For the last 20+ years every time I leave the house, I “bless” my family .... by literally raising my right arm and open palm in the direction of each person wherever they may be .... Irene, Jocelyn and JoAnna, and ask God to bless and protect each of them that day. 

So, here’s what hit me as I was SETTING THE BURGLAR and FIRE ALARM, LOCKING the door, and entering the garage .... I thought, “I can’t protect my family against amyloid”.  I can set the alarm and endeavor to do all that I can within my power to “protect” but this worthy enemy called amyloid is a very significant threat to overcome.  Even the “risk transfer” component of a healthy diet and exercise mantra is irrelevant.  The disease does not discriminate.  Healthy or not, it can strike anyone at anytime.  Candidly, it was a hard hitting, frustrating feeling, which was, truthfully, extremely overwhelming to consider. 

I thought again about Eldredge’s book, “Wild at Heart”, which identifies the three core needs of a man ....

• A battle to fight
• An adventure to live
• A Beauty to rescue

Jumping into “WARRIOR” mode was the natural response when Irene’s symptoms were first diagnosed and we were in “emergency mode” throughout the three month hospital stay.  My initiative was to fight the enemy and was literally in “a beauty to rescue” mode .... fitting perfectly into a man’s greatest needs .... but it dawned on me yesterday .... “I couldn’t protect her from amyloid ....”

Sue Martinez picked Irene up from dialysis treatment today. Irene rested this afternoon and ate a light dinner that Jocelyn fixed for her before going home from work.  It’s very convenient for us to be right in the middle of Jocelyn’s apartment and her office!!!

So what do we do when we encounter something completely out of our control?  Something so immense, so enormous, so colossal, that we’re unable to make any progress overcoming the challenge on our own.  In fact, the mere stature of the beast is intimidating and overwhelming to even contemplate.  So, what do we do?  For me, we completely surrender to Him who is in control.  We entrust ourselves to Him who is faithful.

Thanks for caring.

Caminando con Fé
Dave

Hello Dave and Irene,

We are still here praying for you and standing in for you in prayer with our church.  On Sunday, we stood at the altar and became anointed for you.  We love you and know that you are a fighter and a miracle.  Stay at peace in his holiness.

Lori & Dave Gongora

9 p.m…

When I returned home this evening around 7 p.m., I couldn’t find Irene in any of the living areas of the house… as I continued to scurry through each room calling out her name many thoughts flooded my mind related to her safety and welfare…that is, until I saw the back door wide open and discovered her, water hose in hand, fertilizing plants, smiling ear to ear and enjoying the “wisteria garden”!!

I later learned that after spending time earlier in the day with Phyllis Cauwels and also enjoying an extended telephone call with Margie Anderson, she became restless, despite the nagging nausea. So, she did two loads of laundry, ironed, mopped the kitchen and vacuumed the entire house before proceeding outside. Perhaps her recovery has been stifled because of me?

Irene received a call late in the day from UCSF with more good news. Her bilirubin count is 1.9; the lowest it has been since the stem cell transplant. With a target of 1.5, she is making significant progress!!

Thank you for your continued support for Irene during this recovery season. Hopefully she’s “coming down Everest”. We know that there are going to be really good days like this one, challenging days like we’ve seen before, and through it all, we see the Hand of God in our midst. He is in control.

Caminando con Fé
Dave

Dear Irene and Dave,

My husband and I were touched by reading your website. 

Your experience with true physical suffering is clearly giving you the kind of growth that is not possible without suffering.  We were especially convicted by the fact that from the beginning of your marriage you invested time and energy in making Jesus the center of your marriage.  Surely, you are reaping rewards now that the storm has come. 

You as individuals and as a couple are built on the Rock that will never be moved.  It is a reminder to us that we need to emulate this in our own marriage.  (We liked the concept of ’ windshield time’).  We will be praying for you.

In Christ,

Matt and Pat Daniels

9 p.m. ....

The UCSF team has told us over and over again that if there was a critical path related to Irene’s medical treatment protocol, she’s the patient that took the radical departure .... on almost every occasion.  If there was a prescribed medication noting that it “may cause side effects”, Irene was the patient that did, in fact, have those side effects!! Irene’s medical case is already being used over and over again in the UCSF Resident Program classroom. 

The degree of complication related to her journey has baffled many and has been, at times, almost overwhelming.  I say almost, because, in my humble opinion, Irene is a walking miracle .... today.  We are seeing God at work and answering prayer.  We haven’t seen her body completely healed of this disease, yet, but what we do see is that she has overcome significant obstacles and is making slow, but steady progress.  Despite it all, she still maintains an amazing and positive attitude with the same gentle spirit.

For those who have followed the updates closely, you’re aware that I have often used the “Mount Everest” illustration.  To briefly elaborate, I have stated that Irene, with very little cold weather clothing or equipment, had to take this journey to the top of the mountain.  My job, and that of many others, especially the primary medical team, has been to set up base camp for her along the way and support her along the journey.  Today I am willing to say that she has made it to the “Summit of Everest” and is now heading down the snowy, icy and dangerous mountain.  It’s still a treacherous journey, with known and unknown risks along the way, but Irene is hopefully over the most difficult part of the trail. 

Here is what we do know after the UCSF outpatient services exam today which also included seeing Dr. Lloyd Damon:

• Irene has very high blood pressure but is on medication; it is not unusual for abnormal kidney function to cause high blood pressure
• Chronic nausea is still an ongoing issue but hopefully it will subside over time
• Weight loss stands at 28 pounds since hospital admission
• Amyloid is still in her bloodstream, but hopefully the manufacturing of new amyloid has stopped; tests will be taken in about 30 days to ascertain the amount of amyloid still in Irene’s system or hopefully we’ll find out it is in remission
• The kidneys still need to wake up; MWF dialysis will continue. The longer Irene is on dialysis the more likely that the kidneys will not respond
• All of the blood counts were acceptable today; the additional good news is that the Dapsone was causing an abnormality (hereditary and once again a medical tangent specific to Irene) which raised the concern about internal bleeding.  The medication was changed last week and there is no further evidence of internal bleeding!
• Irene doesn’t go back to UCSF for outpatient services again until October 1st!

I have told Irene for years that she is “one in a bazillion”.  With all of the medical tangents she’s been on she has proved it over and over again!!!!  She has taken the dangerous journey to the “Summit of Everest” and is an inspiration to many of us along the way because of her gentle yet determined spirit.  We continue to pray that she now makes it down and completely off the mountain soon.  Thank you for your continued care, prayer, concern and support for us during this incredible season of our lives!!

Caminando con Fé

Dave

8 p.m. ....

I perceive many astonishing and intriguing similarities between the psalmist’s prayer and Irene’s experience as I read several verses of Psalm 102, from The Living Bible version.  Simply read through it slowly; my observations follow.

1 Lord, hear my prayer!  Listen to my plea!

2 Don’t turn away from me in this time of my distress.  Bend down your ear and give me speedy answers, 3 for my days disappear like smoke.  My health is broken and my heart is sick; it is trampled like grass and is withered.  4 My food is tasteless, and I have lost my appetite.  5 I am reduced to skin and bones .... 6 I lie awake, lonely as a solitary sparrow on the roof.

11 My life is passing swiftly as the evening shadows.  I am withering like grass ....

17 He will listen to the prayers of the destitute, for he is never too busy to heed their requests.  18 I am recording this so that future generations will also praise the Lord for all that he has done.

23 He has cut me down middle life, shortening my days.  24 But I cried out to him, “O God, you live forever and forever! Don’t let me die half through my years.  25 In ages past you laid the foundations with your hands!  26 They shall perish, but you go on forever. 

28 But our families will continue; generation after generation will be preserved by your protection.”

Can you, like me, see Irene’s “fingerprints” all over these verses?  Could it be that the psalmist was also afflicted with Amyloidosis or ESRD? Obviously, without empirical evidence, here is how I humbly interpret the above:

Verses 1,2,3: Irene petitions the living God as she faces Primary Amyloidosis

Verse 4: Because of the chemotherapy, nausea and ESRD, Irene’s food is utterly tasteless (there’s even a metallic taste to it)

Verse 5/11: Irene has lost 28 pounds from the disease and treatment

Verse 6: Irene is plagued with nightly insomnia; a direct side effect of ESRD

Verses 17, 18: Irene continues to petition the Lord for His healing touch and has full confidence in him, trusting that he is never too busy to heed our requests

Verse 18: http://www.irenedias.com is way to record Irene’s journey as a testimony for generations to come ....

Verses 23, 24, 25: With symptoms and diagnosis of incurable Primary Amyloidosis at the age of 50, with a lifetime expectancy obviously much higher, Irene prays to God for him to preserve and extend her life

Verse 28: Irene is confident that God will preserve our family through this ordeal

I would recommend that you re-read the first section overlaying Irene’s symptoms to the psalmist’s prayer .... it’s fascinating to think about ....

Irene’s day started very slowly and with intense nausea, but as the day progressed she felt better.  We enjoyed Ahi tuna steaks and spinach for dinner and have settled in for the evening.  We travel to UCSF tomorrow after Irene’s early morning dialysis treatment in Watsonville.  It will be a big day for her.

Please join me and pray that Irene’s symptoms subside, her petitions and desires are fulfilled, and that she is completely healed and restored.

Caminando con Fé

Dave

9 p.m. ....

What have I taken for granted ....?  What is my “highest and most significant calling” at this juncture of life ....?  How do we move forward in a “world” that is suddenly turned upside down and a paradox to that which we were experiencing ....?

Those are just a few of the many questions that I have grappled with since Irene was hospitalized at UCSF and where I was literally living for almost three months.  Now that Irene is recovering at home, this peculiar and mysterious season has caused me “pause” related to many of our existing commitments and that of maintaining a well functioning house and home. 

During this pause, I reflect upon the many times that I would come back to an empty house about once a week when Irene was at UCSF.  It was very peculiar and surreal, knowing that Irene was lying in a hospital bed with an extremely rare disease, in harm’s way and about 100 miles away.  I would hurriedly scramble through the “lonely” house to take care of necessary duties, i.e. laundry, water plants, pay bills, check for leaky faucets etc., dart here and there for local errands and finally rush back to San Francisco. 

These new circumstances also cause me pause vocationally and avocation ally.  It’s caused me to ask myself “To what am I giving most of my waking hours and my most productive years?” and “Does what I do really matter?” “And, if the answer is yes, to whom does it matter?”

The pause has especially caused me to further contemplate the TEMPORAL as opposed to the ETERNAL.

I appreciate what Ken Boa shares in his book, Conformed to His Image:

“People think they want pleasure, recognition, popularity, status, and power, but the pursuit of these things leads to emptiness, delusion, and foolishness.  God has set eternity in our hearts (Ecclesiastes 3:11), and our deepest desires are fulfillment (love, joy, peace), reality (that which does not fade away), and wisdom (skill in living).  The only path to this true fulfillment lies in consciously choosing God’s value system over that which this world offers.  This choice is based on trusting in a Person we have not yet seen.”

“And though you have not seen Him, you love Him, and though you do not see him now, but believe in Him, you greatly rejoice with joy inexpressible and full of glory, obtaining as the outcome of your faith the salvation of your souls.”
1 Peter 1:8-9

Irene had a great day, even amidst the chronic nausea battle.  She is not one to hold a pity party and wants to get on with life!  Our first objective this morning was to purchase an ergonomic bed wedge which we located at a nearby medical supplies store.  After that we casually strolled through a local nursery where she took great delight in the aroma of various plant and flower varieties.  We then meandered through the new Home Depot and bought a garden hose for her “wisteria” garden.  Finally, we grabbed a slice of Pleasure Point Pizza and ate overlooking the Art & Wine Festival and beautiful day in Capitola Village.  After the busy outing Irene took a very long, satisfying nap!!  Then, to my surprise, she was in the backyard flower garden for two more hours!!!  The only challenge was when she slipped and fell onto her tailbone on the garden hillside; certainly a scary moment as I gathered her up in my arms but she “shook it off” and went back to the “wisteria garden” for more .... see the photo below (taken after her fall)!!!!  What’s that ad?  “.... takes a lickin’ but keeps on tickin’ ....”

Life can be full of challenging questions.  It’s how we contemplate, navigate and answer the ultimate questions of life that determine the measure and quality of our true fulfillment.  Circumstances may cause us pause, but we cannot “TiVo” life.  But pausing occasionally is good thing, for to deeply reflect and meditate is something that many of us rarely do with discipline.  The “noise” of life simply gets in the way.  For Irene and me our “pause” is put into “play” when we intentionally choose God’s ways over our ways and the eternal over the temporal.  We know that our days on this earth are numbered and that our finite understanding can only be fully realized as we walk by faith and not by sight, loving, believing and trusting in the Person we have yet to see face to face.

Caminando con Fé
Dave

Dave,
You should write a book..love the updates and wisdom you are sharing. They inspire so many, including us!

Irene,
We love you and each day you are prayed for…we are so proud of you and stand committed with you for the long haul. May each new day bring you closer to full and complete healing. We long to see you again.

Love,
Dave and Larua

9 p.m. ....

God has created us to be in relationship with not only Him but with each other. 

“The LORD God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.’”
Genesis 2:18

Irene has been more than a “suitable helper”.  In fact, she is a model wife and mom.  Her servant’s heart has made it easy to reciprocate.  We have, however, been intentional about learning more specifically about how to serve one another’s needs and, as mentioned in a recent UPDATE, have utilized a variety of resources over the years.  One of my favorite memories is reading select passages from the Song of Solomon to Irene at our 20th wedding anniversary dinner at a romantic restaurant in Monterey. 

What about you?  Have you discovered the secret to a man’s soul or unveiled the mystery of a woman’s soul?  If not, we have added two incredible books to peruse in the Spiritual Resources section.  We have done this for one reason; it’s incredibly important.

• Wild at Heart by John Eldredge
• Captivating by John and Stasi Eldredge

Here’s a very concise, high level overview:

A man needs:

• A battle to fight
• An adventure to live
• A Beauty to rescue

A woman has three core desires:

• To be romanced
• To play a role in her own adventures
• To display beauty

Sue Martinez picked Irene up from an early morning dialysis treatment and took her to Starbucks.  They came to the house, enjoyed the wisteria garden and had a great visit.  Irene enjoyed a better “tummy” day than yesterday and rested most of the afternoon. 

By the way, it happened again!!  This evening while picking up a “to go” order from a local favorite of ours, I was overwhelmed with several of the restaurant employees who inquired about how Irene is doing .... asking for her by name!!!  What can I say?  She touches everyone she meets ....

I am so thankful that God has created man and woman.  Irene and I have enjoyed “peeling the onion back” and discovering each other afresh and anew each day.  Besides that, life would be so boring if all I did was hang around the guys ....

Caminando con Fé
Dave

Hi Irene -  As your journey continues, your faith and witness remain such an inspiration. May each day bring a little more strength and less nausea. Thank you Dave, for your updates, and for giving us specific things to pray for.
With our love and prayers, John and Carole Reynolds

9 p.m. ....

In Attitude 101, John Maxwell points out how the use of vocabulary can influence our outlook on life. He recommends the following:

Eliminate these words:	Use these words:
I can't	I can
If	I will
Doubt	Expect the best
I don't think	I will make the time
Maybe	Positively
I'm afraid of	I am confident
I don’t believe	I do believe
(minimize) I	(promote) You
It's impossible	All things are possible

ATTITUDE is so much of where Irene is living everyday. Despite the nausea, lethargy and MWF dialysis regime, she continues to amaze me with a joyful and upbeat attitude. Her word choices have always been weighed with discretion. She has strong faith and hope in Jesus .... and personifies this passage of scripture in her prayer life:

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he (or she) should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him (or her). But when he (or she) asks, he (or she) must believe and not doubt, because he (or she) who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That man (or woman) should not think he (or she) will receive anything from the Lord; he (or she) is a double-minded man (or woman), unstable in all he (or she) does."
James 1:2-8

While I was in Sacramento today attending an InterWest board meeting, Irene enjoyed a nice visit with Marilyn & Fred Miller who also brought her lunch. We're so grateful for how family and friends are supporting us in many wonderful ways!

Irene's careful vocabulary choices, combined with a joyful ATTITUDE and significant confidence in God's Word & Ways, represent a powerful combination on this journey. And talk about attitude .... she continues to smile through it all ....

Caminando con Fé
Dave

8 p.m. ....

We have added a new category to IreneDias.com: SPIRITUAL RESOURCES.

According to Dictionary.com:

SPIRITUAL is defined as:

• Of, relating to, consisting of, or having the nature of spirit; not tangible or material
• Of, concerned with, or affecting the soul
• Of, from, or relating to God

RESOURCE is defined as:

• An available supply that can be drawn on when needed
• The ability to deal with a difficult or troublesome situation effectively
• Means that can be used to cope with a difficult situation

We hope that you find this new category helpful.  Our goal is to provide relevant information at your fingertips.  If there are questions related to anything we post, please send us an email!!  We’ll be adding content to the category over time.

After an early morning dialysis treatment, Sue Martinez picked Irene up and they made a “bee line” to Erik’s Deli before coming home.  Although she was able to keep her sandwich down, she’s been extremely nauseated and lethargic all afternoon and evening.  Thank you for your prayer intercession .... Irene really needs comfort on days like this one!!!

We know that God is the INFINITE RESOURCE.  He can and does sustain us.  We can draw upon him 24/7.  So if and when you don’t have access to Irene’s website, you still have immediate access to the Father, through Jesus, His Son. To access Him, you don’t need a dial up, DSL, T-1 or cable connection!!  All you need .... is a receptive heart.

Caminando con Fé

Dave

9 p.m. ....

We launched IreneDias.com on June 4, 2007.  Google Analytics emails some fun and interesting information to us each week.  Here are the stats from this last week:

• 574 visits, with 196 absolute Unique Visitors (a Unique Visitor refers to a person who may have visited the site more than once in a week — they are counted only once no matter how many times they visit)
• 1438 page views
• 2.51 average page views
• 5.55 average time on site (five minutes, 55 seconds)
• 10.45% new visits to the site

Each visit represents a person and we’re grateful that so many continue to “track” Irene’s journey. 

Phyllis Cauwels brought Irene a Starbucks drink with a treat this morning and spent a couple of hours with her.  Beth, a gifted physical therapist, spent an hour with Irene this afternoon .... Irene’s strength is growing .... despite the lingering nausea and sleepy kidneys!!  We filled the blood pressure Rx today and will be monitoring potential side effects including “dizziness”.  Hopefully it will make a difference!!
While stats and web analytics are fun, we’re not a number with God, for he knows each of us by name.

“.... The Lord knows those who are his ....”
2 Timothy 2:19

It’s comforting that he knows each of us by name and that we belong to Him.

Caminando con Fé
Dave